Milk and Cigarettes

Rambles about stuff I like.

Happy Birthday To My Brother – Here’s a great burger I thought of!

Well, today just so happens to be my brother’s birthday, so a big happy B-Day to him. 

I don’t really have anything specific to write about today, so it’s gonna be a rumble-ramble.

Man, is there any better way to prepare ground beef than to mix in a little taco spices? If McDonald’s could make a taco-spiced flavoured burger, I would be so happy! Taco spice is not hot at all, just flavourful and savoury. (Can you tell I just ate taco meat recently.)

Surprisingly, Taco Bell doesn’t make good taco-flavoured beef. Their spices are bland and barely there. Real taco meat has onions and tomatoes and a bit of a kick. O how I love taco meat!

With that in mind, let me tell you about a great burger idea I just had. To start, you’ll need to get some lean ground beef, mix in a heaping helping of taco seasoning, then add some onions and tomatoes. Mix all that together until you’ve got a quarter-pound (or better!!!) sized burger patty. Throw that on the BBQ.

Mmkay, now get a hamburger bun (don’t waste your time with whole-grain hamburger buns, that isn’t what we’re going for here) – butter the bun, and then slather on some cheese. (I recommend cheddar on one bun and mozzarella on the other.) Throw that bun in the toaster oven until the cheese is melted and the bun is toasty (but not too toasty, we still want some moisture in the bun.) 

While your burger and bun are cooking, you’ll want to cook up at least 4 strips of bacon. I recommend brushing your bacon with maple syrup halfway through, so when it’s done, you’ve got nicely cooked bacon that’s not too crisp and just a little sweet.

Finally, you can either deep fry yourself some onion rings or chop up some onions and deep fry those. Point is, you’re gonna need some onions covered in batter and deep fried goodness.

Ok, we’ve got the taco burger, cheesy bun, maple bacon and battered onions. Stack them all one on top of the other. (Garnish with lettuce, tomato, pickle and other healthy nonsense as much as you like.) Put on a bit of ketchup and voila, that is gonna be one tasty burger! (Not to mention loaded with at least a 2 day supply of calories.)

But come to think of it, if you’ve got a deep fryer – then once you’ve assembled that burger, toss the whole goddamn thing in the deep fryer! Guh! Deep fried taco maple bacon double-cheese burger! WOW! 

Y’know, technically, a burger is a sandwich – ’cause a sandwich is just meat in between two slices of bread. In fact, I don’t even think there necessarily needs to be meat! (‘Cause, peanut butter sandwiches!) So just about anything between two slices of bread is a sandwich. So then, I think I have just created one of the greatest sandwiches known to man.

Oh wait – I totally forgot to put a fried egg on top of that burger! Would that make it better? Here’s another great idea – find a machine that makes bread-shaped pancakes. So that you can create an awesome breakfast sandwich by putting a sausage patty in between the pancake bread, and NOW we can put a fried egg on top.

If you’ve never had pancakes with a fried egg, you’re missing out.



September 3, 2013 - Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , ,

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