Milk and Cigarettes

Rambles about stuff I like.

Television, the wire and a creepy boob sucking story

Well, I dunno if SnarkWatch is gonna fly. It takes up a lotta time, not just 15 minutes. Maybe I’ll just ramble here about TV and stick to a separate blog for goals. Goals I can ramble about forever, without having to pause VLC to take a snapshot of the action.

Anyhoo, I was watching Star Trek: The Next Generation, but I got pretty sick of it. It’s set up so that the crew of the Starship Enterprise is always facing impending doom right up until 5 minutes before the show ends, before there’s a magic rip in the space-time continuum, and everything gets fixed.

Plus, aside from Capt. Picard and Worf, I don’t really like any of the characters. Riker is an alcoholic sex fiend, Data is an android who can’t quite comprehend this feeling you call, LOVE, Troi is the ship’s “counselor” yet she gets a spot on the bridge with the Capt. and 1st officer. Honestly, Troi is just there because she’s got a bodacious rack – seriously, every character on the show has a uniform that goes all the way up to the neck, except for Troi, she’s got a low-cut affair that shows off her boobs.

Image

I guess they don’t have yoga pants in the 24th century.

There is a mildly attractive redhead on the show, but she has the most annoying kid in the world, who goes by the name of Wesley Crusher. And Capt. Picard is trying to get with the redhead, so he fast-tracks Wesley into acting ensign. Ugh, come on Captain Picard, don’t be so beta.

Also, Captain Picard is French, but speaks with an upper-crust English accent.

Anyhoo, I’m now re-watching The Wire. MAN! That is a badass show! I started watching it again, because a buddy of mine is watching it for the first time, and now he’s done the second season and referencing event that I forgot.

I guess I watched The Wire way back in like, 2008 or so, when it first came out. So that’s close to 5 years ago, so no wonder I’ve forgotten everything. But I’m about to watch the 3rd episode and it’s already pretty crazy awesome.

I also watched a couple episodes of Ray Donovan awhile ago. It’s about Liev Schrieber, who plays Ray Donovan, a Hollywood fixed, who can handle any problems his high-profile clients can throw at him, but can’t handle his troubled family.

Actually, Jon Voight plays the criminal patriarch of the family who’s just been released from prison, and his return into the fold threatens the stability of the Donovans. There’s a lot of intrigue, and sly references to past actions that caused Jon Voight to go to jail… But I dunno if I can handle it. It’s already pretty tense, and it’s for sure a “drama” – one of Ray’s brothers got raped by a priest as a kid, and it fucked him up pretty bad, and it’s a big elephant in the room.

Anyhoo, I was like this when I was watching, “Breaking Bad.” I watched the first 2 seasons straight through and then gave up midway through the 1st episode of the 3rd season. It’s just so goddamn tense! You know something bad is coming down the pike, and all my yelling at the screen doesn’t change any actions of the characters!

It’s the same thing for Ray Donovan. I know that bad shit is gonna go down, but I keep yelling at Ray not to go in there, and what does he do? He goes in there! Aaaaah! Tense!

So yeah… I’ll stick with The Wire. It’s tense, but in a different way. Also, I’ve already seen it… so I don’t think it’ll be that bad.

Plus, I remember a few things about The Wire. Like Omar, and how bad-ass he is. Aaaaand… there’s a kid named Dookie, aaaaand the mayor says, “Sheeeeeeiiiiiiit” a lot. But as for major plot points and intricate details? Nope, can’t remember a damn thing.

Anyhoo, so that’s what I’m watching at the moment. Snarkwatch may bite the dust before long, because mostly I like watching a tv show on one screen and surfing the web or playing video games on the other. A Snarkwatch will require me to actually pay attention to one screen at a time. I say that’s not enough novelty! I require more distraction. MORE!

And there you have it. Oh, and to satisfy all my crazy weird search term-ers.

She ran across the floor. She was not wearing a sports bra. Her boobs bounced mightily as she slipped and fell. As her skull cracked open on the floor, her cat came up and started pawing at her breasts. She died with the cat licking her nipple.

There ya go! A boob sucking story.. Weird, gross… perfect for someone’s creepy fetish. Enjoy!

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December 18, 2013 - Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , ,

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