Milk and Cigarettes

Rambles about stuff I like.

PSH on the opium trail.

Welp, that was a pretty disappointing performance yesterday by Peyton Manning. All I really wanted was an exciting game – blowouts are super-boring. And so that’s what that game was, ultimately – super-boring.

But on the plus side, I ate pulled pork, chicken wings, nachos, jalapeno poppers and a couple beer. It was a mighty meat-eating day, and that’s what it’s all about.

Anyhoo, back on the ol’ diet trail today. Of course, there’s plenty of leftovers from yesteday – but my diet is just maintaining a 2000 calorie ceiling, so I can eat whatever I want, as long as I stay below 2000 calories. Pretty glorious, as I had eggs and pulled pork for lunch today. Yowza is that ever good! Pulled pork is a pretty awesome dish.

Anyhoo, what else is going on in the world? Well, Phillip Seymour Hoffman died yesterday from a heroin overdose. As far as ways to die go, that’s a pretty stupid way to go. Especially if you’re 46, as PSH was. It’s not like he was a rock star who lived fast and died young. And judging by his weight, it’s not like he had been addicted to heroin for long – I mean, there aren’t a hell of a lot of fat heroin addicts walking around. Also, since PSH was rich, why couldn’t he afford some upper-grade heroin? The rumors I hear are that he shot up with a bad batch of heroin. I mean, hey, just go straight for opium or morphine or something. 

Fun fact time! Did you know that heroin is a brand name? That’s right! Heroin was invented by Bayer in 1895. Well, I say invented – that’s not particularly accurate. Heroin is some sort of opiate derivative, and was first synthesized in the late 1800’s. But it was Bayer who had the clever idea of calling it heroin and selling it. This is a funny quote from the article: 

[Heroin] was developed chiefly as a morphine substitute for cough suppressants that did not have morphine’s addictive side-effects. Morphine at the time was a popular recreational drug, and Bayer wished to find a similar but non-addictive substitute to market. However, contrary to Bayer’s advertising as a “non-addictive morphine substitute,” heroin would soon have one of the highest rates of dependence among its users.

Good ol’ heroin! That’ll help you shake that pesky morphine habit.

Anyhoo, that’s the big celebrity gossip that’s going on today. I think the death of PSH is more tragic than, say, the death of Paul Walker, primarily because PSH was such a better actor than Walker. Sure, Walker may have been mourned by fangirls of 2 fast 2 furious – but PSH was such a versatile actor, that anyone who likes movies can almost be guaranteed to have seen him in something. I mean, he was in Boogie Nights, Twister, The Big Lebowski… That’s just off the top of my head. If I bothered to check IMDB, I’m sure there’s plenty of other great movies he was in.

So… yeah. PSH. Dead from heroin. Fool.

One thing I read on the interwebs was, of course, a conspiracy concerning PSH’s death. The story goes like this: PSH acted in a movie called, “The Master”, which was loosely based on the life of L. Ron Hubbard. Naturally, Scientologists, being the crazy cult that they are, took exception to this performance, and set up PSH to die somehow. Since it’s a conspiracy, there’s no more info (or tangible evidence) than this. But if I had to expand on this conspiracy, then I would guess that Scientology somehow got to PSH’s heroin dealer, and managed to slip him some doctored stuff. Then PSH spikes up and dies from the toxic heroin. (I mean, more toxic than just the heroin itself.)

But that’s all complete, wild-ass conjecture – not even conjecture, it’s just made up information that I thought up to complete the conspiracy. Don’t come after me, Scientologists. I’m sure you didn’t have PSH killed – although I sure as hell wouldn’t put it past you assholes.



February 3, 2014 - Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , ,

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