Milk and Cigarettes

Rambles about stuff I like.

A ramble about making out and sleep and stuff

My date last night went well. Picked up J3, went to her place, watched a movie, made out for a bit, went home. I like J3, she’s very pretty and fun to be around – it’s a bit weird ’cause she’s taller than me, but I’m not going to make the mistake of over-investing my feelings this early. I’ll continue to see her and see what happens. And in the meantime, I’ll keep up with Tinder and dating and see what happens.

One thing I do know is that I totally need my sleep. Because my date was so late last night, I got home around 12:30, then didn’t fall asleep until about 1:30. Then I woke up before my alarm, so I’m drag-assing it today. I’ve got a sushi event with my colleagues tonight – and after that, I plan to come home and go right to bed. I’ll probably avoid making any dates for tomorrow, as I would like to spend the weekend cleaning up, working out and working on my thesis. My plan is to have the thesis written in rough by May 1st. And I’ve only got 2 more classes left to TA, and no marking – so all of April will just be writing the thesis all day, every day. Oh well, suck it up – grind through the month, and then I’ll be a doctor!

Anyhoo, when it comes to dating and self-validation and all that, my biggest problem, I think, is stressing out about the future. I’d be much better served to focus on the here and now – especially focusing on today and how I can make the most out of it. Of course, it’s super tough for me to focus when I’m tired – so I think the best thing I can focus on is getting to bed early and getting a good sleep.

What’s really been messing me up are my 8:30AM Thursday morning classes. Thursday mornings are always rushed – and I don’t get enough coffee, or a nice relaxing morning. When it comes time for the summer – I’ll be teaching Tuesday and Thursday evenings. So my plan is to move to an evening schedule – something like, wake up at 8:00 – start working out by 10:00, then I’m showered and ready to work by the crack of noon. I also especially like working out in the morning – as I always feel tremendous after I exercise, and I can feel better about myself knowing I’ve been to the gym.

Another thing about dating: one thing I was reading online before I went out last night was the idea of being playful. I took this to heart, and I think it made for a much more successful date. Generally, when I talk with my buddies, I like to talk about politics, and other weighty things. But girls aren’t buddies – girls, for the most part, don’t want to have long, technical, weighty conversations. They want to have fun! And so that’s what I focused on last night – was just being playful with J3 and having a good time. And you know what – I totally had a good time. We joked around all night about stuff, and she was all smiles when we were making out.

I think, when it comes to dating, a little confidence goes a long way. For the past little while, I’ve been bummed about J2 and going through “get back together” fantasies and things like that. As a result, I was feeling distressed about my love goals. But after last night, I’ve realized that, hey, I’m awesome and girls want to be with me. I know I should’ve internalized that message a long time ago, but I’m easily stressed, so I haven’t. But today, I’m feeling pretty good about myself – I’m confident that I’ll be able to meet attractive women in the future, and that I’ll eventually fulfill my need for deep, emotional and physical connection.

It’s amazing what making out can do for one’s confidence.

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March 27, 2015 - Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , ,

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